“Relationship”- an innocent little term, which sums up a
wide range of insane, extreme, senti, smelly, sticky, guey and more often than
not fatal feelings together. Now, we all know most relationships in the world
are beyond repair. Your mother just won’t understand why you have to get up at
eleven am on a beautiful Sunday morning! And you just won’t understand why your
mother just won’t understand. Your father wants to know what you would do with
your life. You want to know what you would do about him wanting to know that.
Then there are bhaiyas and didis, who are almost the most successful people in
the world, and who will make it a point to call you just when your results are
out, and lecture you about life and death. And your chachas, chachis, mausas, mausis, buas, phuphajis, who after hearing
about your hard earned eighty nine point five per cent, would just click their
tongues and end the conversation with a subtle “oh!” I mean, WHAT DO YOU SAY
AFTER A WRETCHED “OH”?!!
So basically, right from the beginning, we see what
“relationships” are like. We feel the agony. We feel the pain. We feel immense
frustration well up within us. We want to escape. We want to break free from
the shackles of relationships. We face the repercussions of being tied in so
many of them. And we learn... or..er..
maybe not?
We go out and form more relationships. Like we didn’t have
enough, already? We meet guys and girls
and let our jumpy hormones screw us over. Time and again. So, after spending
one fourth of our lives dealing with the baggage of relationships we are born
with, we find ourselves these extra relationships.
We fall deeply, completely, irrevocably, madly, hopelessly, senselessly, aimlessly,
uselessly, brainlessly in love and give the extras
full control over our lives, without even trying to understand who they are as
individuals. And then obviously issues crop up. There are opinion issues,
judgement issues, ego issues, fidelity issues and major gender issue. Now
gender issues or gender differences are the biggest cause behind all that goes
wrong. A guy would just not understand why a girl calls him suffocating if he
gets possessive, and accuses him of not caring enough, if he doesn’t. And a
girl would refuse to understand why guys need to act like they are PMSing! I
mean, crazy mood swings all the time?
So, I’ve had friends (many!) who found themselves boyfriends
and girlfriends. Life was beautiful till middle school. White winter sunshine;
dirty, crumpled t- shirts; ruddy noses and biiiiiig smiles. Then people got
engulfed in the clutches of puberty and found themselves getting further
entangled in this mayajaal of
relationships. Plus, once they’re into
it, I doubt there’s any looking back.
In the beginning, it’s all beautiful. Music and stars.
Seventeen missed calls and red flowers. “You’re my choco pie” and “You’re my
sunshine.” And that’s all very good, till chocolate ceases to be the flavour of
the month and sunshine translates into garmi
ki dhoop. Then the guy stops calling
enough. The girl stops understanding enough. The guy needs her to get it when
he’s helping a friend with an important assignment, and can’t really call her
up to ask her how her day was. The girl needs him to stop saying “ten minutes,
baby” and making her wait for another four hours before calling her up to tell
her that he had “accidently” dozed off. The guy needs her to stop dragging her sentiments and her sorrows and her pain
into every argument they have. The girl needs him to stop looking at every
issue like it is a Maths problem. The guy needs more space. The girl needs more
sensitivity. And by and by, the blissful, beautiful relationship goes down the
drain. So do they learn, now? Naaaaaahh! They jump from one relationship to
another. Hoping, wishing and praying, incessantly and incorrigibly, for the
next one to work out just fine. But sadly, and obviously, finding that one
perfect extra is next to impossible.
Eventually, people redefine their idea of relationships, of perfect partners,
of soul mates, make a million adjustments, feel exceedingly frustrated, want to
jump off the roof (some actually do so), but never ever stop looking for extras. Extra issues, extra arguments,
extra agony, extra troubles.
No, don’t ask me for a solution to this problem. Don’t even
expect me to know one. I was merely voicing a concern. I may sound like a
cynical eighteen year old, but deep down I am a major fan of unrealistic love
stories. For all you know, tomorrow, you may find me smitten by an extra, as well, expecting him to treat
me like a princess, play music, show me stars, give me seventeen missed calls,
send me flowers, call me his sunshine ..
and well.. umm.. if it’s not too much to
ask for.. rock my world?.... Kidding!
